You Know You Live in Palestine When...

You Know You Live in Palestine When...

...every other day is a holiday.
...police always drive with their lights on.
...the bathroom light switch is always outside the bathroom.
...garbage day means setting the dumpster on fire.
...camels and donkeys are legitimate forms of transportation.
...you can't flush toilet paper.
...following traffic laws is optional.
...the mullet is a fashionable hairstyle for young men.
...the goat path is a reliable form of navigation.
...the movie Titanic lives forever. And my heart will go on and on and on...
...the only time you wear a seat belt is when you drive into Jerusalem. And promptly remove it upon passing through the checkpoint back into the West Bank.
...computer software costs 10 shekels and DVD's are only 5. You just have to wait a minute while the shop owner burns you a copy.
...traffic stops to wait for sheep to cross the street.
...you pause in conversation to wait for the sound of an F-16 to pass.
...the most common cold drink is glorified Kool-Aid with pulp.
...you never pay for a service until it's finished, or whenever you catch up with the serviceman again.
...you use bright headlights only to flash at oncoming traffic.
...the truck playing cheesy music and driving up and down the street is not the ice cream man, he's the gas man.